Third recession >>View Video>>
I’ve been unlucky that I was born in the 80s so this will be my third recession. I was a carpenter when I left school; I did a four year apprenticeship and then I worked as a carpenter for nearly 10 years. The recession came then and it affected the building industry; it totally went. So overnight we went from making good money as tradesmen to making absolutely zero; we all lost our jobs so that was very challenging.
After that happened I dived into music and now this recession is happening and music is the most affected thing. I’ve kinda been laughing about it – if I pick another career I should avoid that career!
It affects your confidence – when you stop making money, you just feel like a bit of a failure and you know it’s not your fault but it can really affect your mental health.
Achieving little things >>View Video>>
It’s important to feel self-worth. Get up early, try not to be lying in bed all day. If you get up early, go for a walk, if you’re fit go for a run, or go for a cycle, go for a swim and if you start your day off like that and then you’ll feel more motivated. The more work you do, the more motivated you’ll be to do more. Sitting at home playing the Playstation with a duvet over your head is not going to do you any good, you’re not going to feel great about yourself.
There are other things that you can do now and you’ll feel better about yourself because you’ll be achieving, even little small things – do an Excel or a Word course, figure out how to use your computer properly, things like that I think are very important because you’ll be achieving little things and you’ll come out of this, “OK well at least I know I how to do this, this and that”.
Don’t be harsh on yourself, try not to be harsh on yourself – everyone feels like shit, it’s not a great time.
Nothing happened >>View Video>>
I suffered from depression, well I discovered I had it when I was about twenty. With me it was something that manifested in my brain when I was a child I suppose.
The mistake that can happen is someone will ask me, “Awh what happened”, nothing happened I’m just not feeling well. I think that’s very important to point out, especially in a conversation about depression. Anybody who suffers from depression will say that, the worst thing that can happen is your partner or your friends going, “What happened? Is there anything I can do?” Nothing happened, I just suffer from depression, there’s a chemical problem in my brain at the moment. Now certain things can happen to people and it can put them in a depression and certain things can trigger it.
I think it’s the stigma, “Okay Jesus, what’s wrong with him, nothing happened to him, he has a great life, he’s got loadsa friends, he’s a musician, he’s up on the stage singing, why’s he depressed?” There’s more to it than just a certain occasion that might trigger it.
Sad eyes >>View Video>>
I was about a year out of school, I had started my apprenticeship, I was working, I’d go home and I’d fall asleep on the couch and my Ma was like, “What’s going on?”. She noticed it in me because I’m very close to my mother and we talk all the time, we talk every day now even, and she just said that I didn’t look happy; she said I’d really sad eyes.
She was asking what was wrong and I was kinda fobbing her off and then I came home one day and she said to me, “I booked you an appointment”, and I was like, “For what? I feel grand”. She brought me down to the G.P., the local G.P. in Bray, and we went to see a doctor who specialised in mental health. This was a while ago when there was a stigma attached to it and nobody really talked about it.
So this doctor was very nice, very kind, and she coaxed it out of me, how I was feeling, and she put me on antidepressants. Everything that she said, I was relating to it. I was like “OK, Jesus I’ve had this since I was a child”. You don’t really realise you have it until someone says it to you and that’s why it’s really important to talk about it.
A nice circle >>View Video>>
When you hear somebody else has a problem you just realise that it’s actually something that can be treated or something that you can engage with rather than just, “Oh fuck there’s something wrong with my head, it’s my personal problem and I can’t talk to anybody about it”.
I played football at the time and I began to talk to other lads, I could see it in other people as well. I was trying to be open about it because I thought: “You could do with the help that I’m getting as well”, and then in turn my friends would talk to their friends so it’s created a nice circle.
People that I’ll meet now, they’ll say to me, “Do you remember we were playing on the team and you said this to me, it helped me a lot”. It created a nice community of young men who could talk to each other.
Know your own brain
I think the most important thing is to know your own brain, to know your own mind, and you might not get there really quickly and it might take a while – I’m in my thirties, late thirties at this stage – and I’ve only just begun to realise the little triggers; things that might be in my head.
I might go out and have a session and I’ll be having terrible thoughts then for three days afterwards, but you need to be able to associate that and go, “OK that’s there for a reason.” Once you can realise that, go for a run, go for a walk, listen to some cool fuckin’ music or do something that will paint over all that shit, because it’s not important.
You get to understand your own brain, you get to understand things that will trigger your depression – don’t be doing coke all night if you’re gonna be depressed for a week, don’t be drinking too much coffee during the day if it’s going to give you anxiety, alcohol can be a trigger as well, so realise what’s making you feel bad.
Also something I’ve done is: for a few days every day right down how you feel. You’ll see the difference, be honest with yourself.
Feel much better when they’re down on paper >>View Video>>
The music industry does have a lot of people suffering but I think being able to have a creative outlet… I couldn’t live without it. It’s an amazing thing to be able to put something down, but if you’re not a musician you can write something down, or talk to someone, or be a little bit creative in some way – get the thoughts out of your head, you’ll feel much better when they’re down on paper, you’ll see they’re not a big deal really.
Blew my mind
I’m first and foremost the biggest music fan in the world. You’ll see me at every gig, every festival, everybody in our band, Columbia Mills, we were mad into music before we started any band, that’s how we’re friends.
Jape did a remix for us recently. It’s out now. He sent us the remix and it blew my mind. I forgot how dancey his stuff was because Richie does a bit of everything but he’s got some bangin’ dance tunes. So I went back and did a deep dive into his old stuff, that’s blowing my mind at the moment.
Because we released the album in April – during the worst time you could ever release an album – and we couldn’t tour it, we asked a couple of people to remix some tracks. We decided, “OK who are we gonna ask?, who do we love the most?”, and there were the guys from Girl Band, Jape, Ryan Vail, and Constantine from Get Well Soon. We asked all of them and they all agreed and we were like, “Fuck! Deadly!”, so they’ve remixed tracks from the CCTV album and getting them back… it was amazing.
The first one out was the Jape track, then Constantine’s remix came out, last Friday was Ryan Vail’s track, and the Girl Band remix will be this Friday. The Remix EP featuring those tracks will be out on November 20th.
We’re just grateful to the lads for doing it. It keeps our music alive and to hear their interpretation of our music it’s just, it’s amazing. We all went as a band to see Girl Band so to get them, Foxy from the band, to remix one of our tracks was just amazing.
Remember, if you’re a member of the Irish music industry, you can talk to a counsellor free of charge at any time of the day or night. Simply call the phone number below.