Tag Archive for: Personal Development

Building Resilience

by Sinead O’Brien

 

1. At some point in your creative career you’re going to be rejected.

When it happens, you might feel paranoid, “Is there something I did wrong? Does somebody not like me?”

You might question everything, “Is this where I should be? Should I be doing something different?”

Sadly, a huge amount of genuine talent leaves the industry as a result of rejection.

 

2. Most successful creatives have been rejected many times.

In my experience as a writer and filmmaker, for every successful project there have been at least 10 that have been rejected.

When you see someone who is doing well, you can guarantee they’ve had projects that didn’t work along the way.

Understand that rejection is part of the creative’s journey no matter what level you’re at.

 

3. Rejection is not personal, it’s business.

If you’re in the arts, you’re putting yourself professionally and emotionally out there. You pour your heart and soul into your work so it hurts deeply when it’s rejected.

Usually it’s not about you, they’re just not looking for what you’re doing at a particular time.

 

4. Treat yourself like a business when you’re putting yourself into the world.

When you’re creating something and in a creative flow, think of yourself as an artist.

When you’re applying for funding, organising tours and payment, think of yourself as a business.

Detaching the two is difficult.

 

5. Wallow in your rejection for a little while.

Crawl into a hole, feel really sorry for yourself. Allow yourself to be completely and utterly vulnerable.

Be good to yourself during this time. Do what eases you out of that negative space – go for a walk, spend time with friends, go to the cinema.

The trick is not to wallow for too long. If every single time you crawl into a hole and don’t come back out again, it’ll be really hard to have any longevity in your career.

 

6. Don’t wait around anticipating emails/phone calls.

Get on with other things. Find something else to throw yourself into after you’ve submitted an application or gone for an audition or interview.

If you’re sitting waiting, you’re in a negative zone, you’re doubting yourself, and so the moment it doesn’t work out, you fall flat.

Keep yourself busy. If you’re doing a lot, then a lot more will happen for you.

 

7. It’s a small, tough industry; don’t be getting annoyed at people.

Nothing good will happen for you while you’re in a negative, bitter and resentful space.

Don’t be bitter towards your peers, they’ve likely been rejected as much as you have.

The very first thing you should do when you hear someone you know has received an award you went for, is congratulate them. It makes you feel better and will help you move on.

If you give off positive vibes, that energy will come back to you.

 

8. Help people and ask people for help

Keep that pond of positivity moving around you. It will make you feel more positive about your work and you won’t get embittered.

 

9. Turn the negative outcome into positive energy.

Go back to a project with fresh eyes: Am I able to fix it following feedback and apply elsewhere?

Maybe change the format. Bring it down another avenue. What else could your project be? Where can you improve it?

When you’re told the time isn’t right, put it to one side. In two year’s time, you might see suitable callouts for it.

 

10. Most creatives do other jobs to keep them going in the industry.

Don’t be embarrassed about this. You might not like a particular job but it pays the bills and enables you to continue making art which is the objective.

Never put all your eggs in one basket.

 

11. When you’ve gotten back on the horse a few times, you’ll get better at it.

The more you grow, the bigger the rejections are. Consciously, work on building resilience early in your career.

Successful people know well how to deal with rejection.

 

12. Social media is only one side of the story.

Seeing other people do well when you’re not, is really tough. People are just trying to promote themselves, as they should. Understand that.

Remember that the people you’re seeing on Instagram are encountering the same difficulties as you; they’re just not advertising it. People don’t publish their rejection letters.

Take a break from social media when you get rejected, it’ll make you feel better.

Remove what doesn’t make you feel good about yourself. If you’re not feeling good about yourself, you’re not in peak creativity.

 

13. Never do two different creative projects in the same day.

It will mess your head up.

 

14. Start a peer whatsapp group among 8-ish people in your industry.

This is a place where you discuss rejection and you can get support – very important if you’re in an isolated job. Being a creative is often an isolating job.

Every so often, do a brainstorm on a group member’s project. E.g. read one person’s script.

Set the group up with people you trust who are constructive. Don’t spend time with people who don’t make you feel good.

 

Unlocking Your Potential: Overcoming Limiting Beliefs & Mental Blocks

by Agnes Burke

1. Understand where your limiting belief comes from.

If you understand where your limiting belief comes from, you’re more likely to be able to change it. It takes a lot of courage to go back and do the hard work of figuring out where that limiting belief came from.

An example of a limiting belief might be, “I’m not a confident person.” Why do you think that? How did that belief begin?

 

2. Visualise

If you didn’t have this self-limiting belief, where would you be right now? How much would you be earning? How would you be feeling? What does that version of you look like?

Map out the path to where you want to go. Visualise your mission, your strategy and your action plan, including your timeline. This is very important and putting it somewhere you can physically see it every day is essential.

 

3. How do you get from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset?

Just do it. There are lots of layers to this, but you have to put one foot in front of the other and make progress. Even if it’s just baby steps.

 

4. Be open to new ideas.

How can you learn from every experience? Flip your mindset around. Ask yourself, “What’s here for me? What’s the golden nugget?”

 

5. Feedback is valuable.

If you’ve been rejected, you’re learning. In every area, every day is a school day. Remember that.

 

6. Celebrate growth and resilience.

We’re not great at celebrating. Think about the goals you have achieved. Pat yourself on the back for achieving them.

 

7. Try positive affirmations.

They do go into your subconscious. Little sayings like: “I’m worthy of success, I’m open to new opportunities.”

Healthy self-talk keeps the door open for growth. You need to practice it. Repeat the words, “I can do it, and I am doing it, and I will do it.”

 

8. Take mindful breaks and practice self-care.

Who fills your cup up? Where do you get the energy that motivates you? How do you look after you?

Take that five minutes for yourself with a cup of coffee or something you enjoy, maybe it’s going for a walk. Really enjoy and savour every moment of it.

 

Effective Communication & Collaboration

by Brian O’Regan

 

Effective collaboration takes time, patience, and effort – but it’s worth it. 

Collaboration allows us to achieve things that we could not achieve on our own, and it enables all parties involved to operate at a higher level. Effective collaboration needs effective communication, and although it can take time to build, it’s always worth the effort.

 

Listen first, and listen with a genuine desire to understand. Then speak. 

Listening is more important than speaking when it comes to effective collaboration, so listen first and then speak. Listen with a desire to understand what the other person is trying to say and try to see things from their perspective first.

 

Approach collaborative conversations with an “abundance mentality”. Try to be as open, honest, and generous as possible. 

Having an “abundance mentality” means believing that there are plenty of opportunities for everyone. When we begin a collaborative relationship in this way, it opens up far more possibilities than a narrower scope would allow. While maintaining a sense of generosity, also be careful to protect your most valuable assets, particularly in the early stages of a new collaboration.

 

Know what you’re bringing to the table, know what you need them to bring to the table, and make sure that you’re both at the same table. 

Effective collaborations are built on strong foundations of mutual alignment and complementary skills, knowledge and resources. Make sure your shared goals and values are aligned, and make sure that what you bring to the relationship complements what the other brings.

 

Build trust by showing trust and by demonstrating trustworthiness.  

Trust is the glue that holds strong collaborative relationships together. We can build reciprocal trust by showing that we trust the other person, and by demonstrating trustworthiness ourselves. Trust takes a long time to build, and it can be shattered in seconds, so treat it with great care.

 

Aim for “synergy” in your relationships, and “win/win” in your agreements.  

Synergy is the highest form of collaboration, and it’s where the collaboration itself brings ideas and results that could not have been achieved by both parties working independently.

When an agreement is reached, make sure it’s a balanced “win/win” agreement, where both parties achieve what they set out to achieve. If this isn’t possible, you can also decide not to collaborate.

 

Ensure you are communicating with clarity, confidence, and intent. 

When you communicate, make sure you’re doing it effectively. Be clear, concise and confident, but not forceful. Before you speak, make sure you know what you’re trying to say. Ensure your non-verbal communication (such as body language) doesn’t contradict what you’re saying verbally.

 

See the value in the different opinions of others.

If someone has a different opinion to yours, or if they’ve done something differently to how you wanted it to be done, don’t criticize them – try to see it as an opportunity to see things from a different perspective. Don’t assume that you’re right. Welcome the opportunity to expand your own knowledge and awareness of different approaches.

 

Deal with disagreements carefully and empathetically. 

Don’t let a disagreement turn into an argument. Find common ground again and go back to basics if you need to. Figure out whether the disagreement is related to your shared vision/goals, your values, or your methods. Take the time to understand their perspective, and don’t make impulsive decisions. If you’ve made a mistake, admit it quickly and honestly.

 

If no solution can be found, carefully consider your options with the other collaborative partners. 

If a collaboration has reached a point where it’s just not working anymore, or if no solution can be found for a particular difference or disagreement, then you’ll need to carefully assess your options depending on the circumstances. This is also where effective communication will be vitally important.

If you’re ending an official collaboration, try to end it collaboratively. You can both agree to disagree. This process may benefit from some external facilitation from a third party but try to resolve it between yourselves first.

How to deal with failure and rejection in your career

by Brian O’Regan

 

1. You haven’t failed until you’ve quit.
Temporary setbacks are inevitable when you’re working towards something big, but unless you’ve stopped trying, then you haven’t failed. If something doesn’t work the first time (or the second or third time), try again. You haven’t failed yet.

2. Failure is something you can control.
If you can decide when you quit, then you can control when you fail. This is an empowering perspective, and it could help you get back on the proverbial horse when you fall off.

3. Rejection isn’t failure. It’s just someone else’s opinion, and you can’t control that.
Rejection is another inevitability when you’re pursuing a career in the creative sector. You can’t control rejection in the same way as you can control failure. Ask for feedback, learn from any mistakes you made (you might not have made any) and try again.

4. Focus your energy on what you can control.
When something goes wrong, think about what level of control you had over the outcome with these 3 questions…
● What did I have control over?
● What was I able to influence (partly control)?
● What did I have no control over?
Next time, focus on what you can control or influence, and don’t worry about what you can’t control.

5. Don’t take it personally.
As an artist/creative practitioner, your art may be very personal and very closely linked to your sense of self-worth. If your work gets rejected by someone, try not to take it as a personal rejection. Try to separate your sense of worth from your work, even if you’ve put your heart and soul into it.

6. Know when to quit, pivot, or change your approach.
How many times should you try something? That’s up to you, but don’t keep doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. If something clearly isn’t working, don’t be afraid to try something different. Sometimes quitting, or choosing to fail at something, is the right decision and it can free you up to focus on something else.

7. Don’t let a fear of failure stop you from trying.
Fear of failure is one of the root causes of procrastination, and over a long period of time, it can be far more debilitating than failure or rejection itself. Fear of failure can lock you into your comfort zone, but in order to learn and grow, you need to break out of it. Sometimes we fail because we’re too far out of our comfort zone, so try and take it one step at a time.

8. Use your support network to talk about your failures and rejections if you find it helpful.
Sometimes, talking about rejections or failures can help to soften the impact, and whomever you talk to will likely have their own stories to share as well. If you’d prefer not to talk to other people about it, try writing about it in a personal journal or even on a scrap of paper. Getting it off your chest can help you feel less isolated and can help you to move on.

9. Take the time to define success and reflect on setbacks.
Before you start something, define what “success” actually looks like. When setbacks occur, take the time to reflect constructively, but don’t dwell on them for too long. Remember what success looks like, think about what level of control/influence you had over the setback, and make a plan to move on.

10. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.
Whether you’re applying for funding, applying for jobs, or trying to find a publisher for your first book, try to always have another potential option in mind while waiting to hear about results or decisions. This may help you to deal with a rejection letter or an unsuccessful application, and could help you to move on to the next opportunity faster.

Empowering women in the music industry

1. It’s not in your head, the music industry has not initially been set up to see women succeed.

If you accept that, it will help you to shape the way you approach your own career and how you support other women.

There are professions that support women succeeding, for example within the education system. In contrast, our music industry traditionally has structural challenges for women in place and it is taking a concerted effort to change that.

 

2. Collaboration is an imperative element in empowering women in music.

Consider engaging with these communities and resources: SheSaidSo
She is the Music, We’ve Only Just Begun, Music Leaders Network, Why Not Her?, Women in Ctrl. The Keychange pledge is also available for organizations to sign up to.

 

3. We can find it hard to be our own champions but championing yourself is rewarding and necessary.

Similarly, amplify the success stories and voices of the women around you.

 

4. Know your commercial worth. People should be paid fairly.

Not being paid fairly happens more to women than men. The gender pay gap is not an issue faced by the music industry alone. Generally, women ask for less money when freelancing. Take a look, do your research and competitively ask for more.

Stick to your boundaries. Define your own framework and work within it. Define your values and ensure they’re protected. You need to feel like you can manage. Define what kind of environment you want to work in.

When negotiating payment, feel empowered to ask, “what’s your offer?”- don’t be afraid to build your case for more if you are familiar with industry salary trends. Do your research and consider, is that rate aligned with my boundaries and values?

 

5. Be transparent and open when talking to women in the industry about money.

Within safe spaces and with people that you trust, talk about pay, talk about salaries, talk about rates.

 

6. Don’t let your actions within this sector be dominated by the feeling of, “I’m so lucky to have this job”.

That can lead to exploitation. The person hiring you is lucky to have someone who works hard and is as diligent as you.

Tips for Approaching Media

by Dwayne Woods

 

Read the publication or listen to the radio show you’re pitching to.

Know the sections of the publication or show. Know why you want to be in that section. Think about the readers or listeners of that publication. Can you give them something new?

Knowing your story and the audience will help the journalist/producer tell your story.

 

Consider the turnaround times/deadlines journalists/producers work to.

Allow a three month window before your album releases.

If the journalist or producer puts out a weekly or daily publication, this will impact the turnaround time they need. A weekly features journalist usually works with an editor so they’d need extra time to work on their piece. A week’s notice is not enough notice in this case.

Never contact a daily features journalist in the afternoon. Their deadlines won’t give them space to talk to you.

 

Try initiating contact with producers or journalists over social media.

If you don’t have an email address, try messaging producers or journalists over social media. Ask them for an email address so that you can send your press release, pitch, and assets in full.

 

Be short and snappy.

Remember you’re writing to someone who tells stories for a living, don’t be too fluffy in your language. If there’s a shorter way of articulating something, go the shorter route.

 

Your pitch accompanies your press release.

Be tailored and targeted in your pitch – this is the email body copy. Don’t send the same pitch to every producer or journalist. You should know what the recipient likes and doesn’t like. Your knowledge of their work feeds into this.

Attach your press release to that pitch email and link to media assets.

 

Don’t send attachments, link to an assets folder. 

When mailing producers or journalists, sending lots of large attachments can cause bounceback/clog up inboxes so link to a folder with your assets such as audio files, large photos.

Ensure meta data is added to files and there’s a clear filename structure. E.g. Bandname – song title.wav 

 

Photos should be high resolution 

This is especially important when pitching to a print publication. Always credit the photographer, and ensure you have their permission to use the photos.

 

Add quotes to your press release. 

Quotes, especially from prominent figures, illuminate a press release and bring a third party dimension to your story.

 

Don’t forget the local angle. 

Approach local papers or radio stations if you’re doing a gig in their area. This will make your story particularly relevant for their readers/listeners.

 

Be authentic.

This will stand to you in any interviews or in-depth features. Never try to be something you’re not and don’t try to be controversial for the sake of it. Telling your authentic story will make you memorable and set you apart.

Tips to Help Develop a Positive Mindset

with Sue Cullen

 

 

  1. Change your circumstances by changing your perception.

 

The human mind is so powerful it can drive you into a dark hole and it can be your biggest cheerleader. It can self-sabotage; bring about fear, but also allow you to feel success, delight, and joy. Your mind can cause you to feel stuck in your past and it can make you worry.

 

The placebo effect is real and works. You trick yourself all the time. You instruct your subconscious mind to find evidence to support your beliefs all the time. Now, start tricking your mind to work in your favour.

 

Your habits will pull you back but even by telling yourself, “Actually, I can do this”, you’re creating an opportunity. If you want to change your circumstances, change your perception.

 

 

  1. Understand the difference between your conscious & subconscious mind.

 

Your conscious mind enables you to evaluate and make decisions.

 

Your subconscious mind trusts and accepts what your conscious mind decides. It’s in your subconscious where you store your habits and your beliefs.

 

As you get older, you rely on your subconscious mind to operate. For example, when you were a child learning to ride a bike, this was done using your conscious mind. Now, when you ride a bike, your subconscious mind does the work.

 

Our conscious and subconscious minds working together is what makes humans powerful and advanced as a species.

 

 

  1. Your mind doesn’t wander, your awareness does.

 

Imagine your awareness is a glowing ball of light, floating around, like an orb. It floats in the vast space that is your mind. Anger, love, as well as all of the different memories that trigger these emotions for you live within this space. Imagine that ball of light travelling around your mind lighting up different areas.

 

When you go to the cinema, you’re paying someone else to take hold of your awareness. The director takes you to different parts of your mind, directing you how to feel.

 

What you become aware of every day can trigger memories and emotions and consequently a physical reaction.

 

 

  1. Grow your awareness.

 

Have you ever been looking for something, maybe a set of keys, before realising they’re in your hand? This is an example of how your brain can keep you from seeing the whole truth. Opportunities are available to you every day but you’re not seeing them all; they’re being blocked out. You’ve convinced yourself you’ve lost your keys, that’s now your truth.

 

The Reticular Activating System is the part of your brain that filters out information to ensure you don’t get overwhelmed. So much information passes through your sensory organs. For example, feel your socks on your toes. Now you can feel them, but you didn’t think about it until it was mentioned.

 

Be conscious of what information you’re giving to your RAS. It works to support your habits and will filter out information to honour and indulge those habits. It matches the labels you’ve given yourself and the beliefs you hold. If you notice and become aware of this, you can make changes more easily and effectively.

 

By growing your awareness, you can learn to work with your mind; make it work in your favour so that you never feel trapped. By becoming more aware, you will start to behave differently and make different choices.

 

Our image of the world and life is distorted by how our brain filters out information. This is all shaped by our experience with the people around us, society, education, and the art and media we consume.

 

Look for further information; further opportunities. There is more to what meets the eye. Often we’ll say, “I’ve tried everything, nothing works”, but we haven’t tried everything. There’s always another way of approaching a problem or responding to a dilemma.

 

Discover the hidden aspects of your life. There are opportunities there. Are there people in your life who have been there all the time but you’ve never had a conversation with them?

 

Become aware of what you’re blocking out. When life presents you with opportunities, you want to show up and experience them in the way they should be experienced.

 

Heightening your awareness will enable you to seize opportunities. Become conscious of your perception. How you perceive life will affect your outcomes. Even by considering this concept,  you’ve already started to make progress.

 

 

  1. Keep your chin up, literally.

 

Practice keeping your chin up so that you’re visually accessing more. This also helps you breathe easier which has a further positive effect on your brain and awareness.

 

 

  1. Once your self-image is formed, it’s difficult to let go of.

 

Your multiple thoughts and self-talk build up your self-image and reinforce it. This informs your performance and your reality.

 

For example, you may have already decided that you’re a shy person. As a result, your body will give you physical reactions to stop you from speaking in public, like a foggy mind, or sweating. Another example is that you may have told yourself you’re a clumsy dancer. Now, your mind will make you worried about falling if you get up on that dance floor. This has become your truth. You’ve attached your emotional history to this truth. You’ve told yourself you’re shy, so now you’re acting shy. Try stepping out of that comfort zone and step into an area of discomfort like you did when you first learned to ride a bike. Acknowledge any physical symptoms that are deterring you from moving forward. For example, if public speaking is uncomfortable for you, go for it and pay attention to your shaky hands or your dry throat. Be aware of what you’re thinking. It’s important to understand the physical symptoms and to feel the big emotions when you’re outside your comfort zone. This enables you to grow and learn from your experiences.

 

We all act in accordance with our truth as we believe it to be. Beliefs are the filters that turn you on and off. If you think you can’t do something, this is often the result of a deep-rooted belief that your brain is programmed to go along with.

 

 

  1. Do your beliefs support you to be the best version of yourself?

 

If you believe in luck, it’s actually that belief and awareness that brings about good fortune. For example, if you’ve seen two magpies and believe that you’ll experience something positive that day, you probably will. Equally, if you’ve crossed a black cat and believe you’re now going to have an awful day, you probably will. If you believe you’ll never achieve something, you won’t achieve it.

 

Beliefs can enable you to be the best version of yourself you can be. They can also control you and discourage you from releasing your full potential. By changing your beliefs, you change your world. To do this, you need to look at things differently.

 

Ask yourself the following questions:

  • What do you want to believe about yourself?
  • What truth do you want to hold?
  • What beliefs will work for you?
  • What’s the consequence of holding onto your beliefs?
  • What if you let go of those beliefs?

 

 

  1. Disrupt the beliefs that are holding you back.

 

Think about the areas of your life in which your beliefs hold you back.

 

  • What beliefs do you hold about your work? Do you believe you’re not assertive? Maybe that’s why you didn’t go for that job that you wanted or you didn’t submit that proposal or apply for that funding.

 

  • What beliefs do you hold about yourself in relationships? Do you believe you can’t maintain a relationship? Do you believe you’re happy single? Do you believe you’re happy in a toxic relationship?

 

  • What about your physical health? Do you believe your body wasn’t made for exercise? Do you believe eating healthy is too much work?

 

  • What beliefs are you holding for yourself? Do you believe you’re moody or emotional? Maybe you believe that you don’t like to show your emotions; you don’t have any emotions, things just don’t bother you. Do you believe you’re not smart?

 

What do you gain from clinging to your beliefs? What do you think will happen if you change them? You can create a more empowering alternative.

 

Think of a limiting belief that you are now prepared to let go of, e.g. “I’m a shy person”. Interrogate this belief. Ask yourself:

 

  • What’s the root of this belief?
  • Where did that belief come from?
  • How long have you had it?
  • What evidence supports this belief?
  • What’s keeping you believing this belief? Fear? Ignorance?
  • What does this belief feel like?
  • What does it mean to you?
  • How does it keep you stuck?
  • What have you done to try to overcome this belief in the past?

 

 

Consider what you would like to replace your limiting belief with, i.e. a new belief such as, “I’m a confident person”.

 

Now ask yourself:

 

  • What do you need, to act on this new belief?
  • How realistic are you with this belief?
  • What are you prepared to do?
  • Who are you going to be with this new belief?
  • How often are you going to exercise this new belief?

 

Pay attention to the emotions that you feel as you ask yourself these questions. To disrupt your deep-rooted beliefs, you need to emotionally connect with the, “Why?”

 

Why do you want to disrupt this belief? If the reason is stronger than the initial belief, you won’t regress.

 

 

  1. Connect the cognitive with the emotional.

 

Unless you connect the cognitive with the emotional, you won’t get far. When you make the connection, the result is powerful.

 

Ask yourself:

 

  • What kind of mood are you in?
  • Are you stressed?
  • Are you feeling down?
  • Angry?
  • Curious?
  • Intrigued?
  • Any level of discomfort or joy?
  • Gratitude?
  • Upset?
  • Does your work fulfil you?
  • Does your life fulfil you?
  • Are you satisfied with your life?

 

 

Connect with the emotions that these questions might stir up. It will help you to understand yourself on a deeper level. Often, we don’t want to go here because it can be painful but it’s important for you to feel in order for you to identify what’s limiting you. Being honest with yourself about how you feel will help you progress. You deserve honesty.

 

 

  1. Improve your quality of thinking to improve the quality of your life.

 

Examine your thoughts in detail. What do you think about every day? Are your thoughts of quality? You’ll likely realise that a lot of them aren’t. What are you saying to yourself? What were you saying to yourself last night before you went to sleep? Your self-talk can be harmful and disempowering. Negative self-talk closes doors for you.

 

Look for the evidence to support what you’re telling yourself. Critically question what you’re saying to yourself. The more honest you are with yourself, the more opportunity you give yourself. When you improve your quality of thinking, you improve the quality of your life.

 

Do you overgeneralise when you talk to yourself? “I don’t like being in relationships.” “I’ll never get the contract.” Do you use phrases like this?

 

Do you minimise or magnify? “I forgot to send the email so my boss hates me.”

 

Do you label? “I didn’t stand up to my colleague because I’m a wimp.” “I’m an idiot for not seeing that coming.”

 

Do you jump to conclusions? Make negative assumptions about how people see you without any evidence? You’re not a mind reader. If your friend doesn’t show up, you don’t know that she can’t be bothered with you, but do you tell yourself that anyway?

 

Do you discount the positives? Do you engage in emotional reasoning? “I feel, therefore it must be true”. Sometimes we feel without even having an experience.

 

Once things go wrong, do you dismiss everything? “The steak is overdone so the whole meal was crap.”

 

Do you use all or nothing statements? “If I don’t get this job then I’m a failure.”

 

“I should”, “I must”, “I have to”. Reframe these into what they really are: “I want to”, and think about why you want to.

 

Every time a negative thought occurs to you, catch yourself and reframe. When negative talk seeps in, tell yourself, “That’s how I used to be, that’s not how I am now. I’m aware of what’s happening.”

 

Be who you want to be. For example, tell yourself, “Up until now I was a procrastinator; I lacked direction but that’s not how I am anymore. I now give 100% to everything I do; I bring energy and enthusiasm to everything I do.”

 

Connect with this new version of yourself. Tell yourself who you now are in detail: “I’ve an amazing work ethic. I’m growing my awareness. I know and understand how my body needs breaks and I nourish my body and my mind. This is me.”

 

If you repeat this kind of affirming self-talk 3-5 times daily, you’ll trick your mind into believing that you are living this and you’ll start moving towards this person more quickly.

 

 

 

  1. Practice gratitude in depth.

 

Effectively practicing gratitude is not as simple as reciting what you’re grateful for at the end of each day. Go a little deeper. Write down three things you’re grateful for today. Consider why you are grateful for them. This practice will change the chemistry in your head. Connecting feelings to what you write is powerful.

 

There must be something that happened today to be grateful for, no matter how small, even if it was a bad day. For example, think of a parent trying to manage a difficult child who constantly misbehaves and never listens. One day, the child didn’t brush his teeth, dress himself, or eat his breakfast. When he was dropped to school, he was shouting in the car. However, he did close the door behind him when he got out of the car. Out of all the pitfalls of that day, the fact that he closed the door behind him is a positive that that parent can be grateful for. Now they have something to build on.

 

So many positives happen all around you every day but you deem them insignificant. Any step forward is an accomplishment. Recognising these will keep you motivated and energised. Consequently, it’ll be easier for you to maintain your progress.

 

 

  1. Be your own cheerleader.

 

We are often the cheerleaders of everybody else. Start being your own cheerleader. Maybe you got to the gym when you contemplated not going. Maybe you got up earlier when you considered going back asleep. They’re accomplishments.

 

Find a mirror. Hold your hand up high. Connect with that person in the mirror; connect with that emotion of celebration. Tell yourself why you’re applauding yourself. Feel it. Give that person in the mirror a high five.

 

We have the memory of doing that to so many other people, but we often fail to stop and give ourselves that recognition.

 

Being your own cheerleader will energise and motivate you. Make it a daily practice, stack it onto a current exercise that you do regularly like brushing your teeth.

 

 

  1. Set a regular alarm to check in on yourself.

 

Set an alarm to go off every hour or two hours. When you hear it, ask yourself how you’re feeling. Reflect on yourself. Consider: “How do I want my next hour to look?”

 

If you’re feeling down, ask yourself, why are you feeling down? If you’re feeling nervous, why are you feeling nervous? Consider what you can do in the next hour to lift your mood.

 

 

  1. Try visualisation.

 

Visualisations are powerful and they take practice. While practicing visualisation, consider your five senses and the three dimensions.

 

Try this:

 

Sit comfortably in your chair. Tell yourself you’re in a safe place. Consciously breathe in and out. Close your eyes. Feel your body relax as you become more comfortable. Pay attention to your posture – your hands loosely on your lap. Take a few slow deep breaths, in through your nose out through your mouth allowing your body to become even more relaxed.

 

Use your imagination to picture yourself standing in a kitchen. What colour are the counter tops and the walls? Notice the smells/sounds, the washing machine, cars outside, the clock on the wall. What are you smelling? Use all of your senses. Take your time. Now imagine a fresh, juicy orange on the counter. Hold it in your hand feeling the supple texture. Now begin to peel the orange, feeling the rough skin against your fingers, and the supple, plumpness of the flesh and juice inside. Smell that fresh orange smell as the skin comes away. Now lift it up to your mouth and take a bite. What was your experience? Can you smell the orange? Can you taste it? Are you salivating? Your memories were triggered during this visualisation.

 

Now try visualisation to ace that interview. Or nail that performance. Imagine you’re walking into the interview room or onto the stage…

 

 

  1. You are the architect of your life.

 

Consider this: An old wise man had his friends around for dinner. He passed fortune cookies to each of them. They excitedly broke open the fortune cookies to see what their futures will hold, but the paper was blank. The man asked his friends to write what they wanted their futures to be.

 

Everything you do is your choice. There is no-one else holding you back; no-one has you at gunpoint. You are in control of your life and your decisions. You need to expect more from yourself than anyone else expects from you.

 

Only you can define your future. Don’t allow it to be dictated to you by anyone else. You get to write the next chapter of your story. What do you want it to be? Who do you want to surround yourself with? You’re the narrator.

Tips: Goal Setting, Productivity & Effectiveness for Creative Minds

Brian O’ Regan – Arts Leaders Associates

www.artsleaders.ie

 

1. Define and articulate your goals
Goals can be short, medium or long-term, but they are not the same as tasks. Short-term goals should be rooted in your daily/weekly habits, while long-term goals should take you a little bit out of your comfort zone. They should make you feel excited, motivated and the best ones can often feel a bit scary at the beginning. Remember, true confidence comes from competence.

2. Use the principles of strategic planning to help with goal setting
In strategic planning, we try to answer these 3 questions: “Where are we now?”, “Where do we want to be?”, “How are we going to get there?”. We can apply these questions to our goal setting, and activities such as doing a personal SWOT Analysis or a personal Resource Audit can be very effective in building a more detailed picture of where we’re starting out from.

3. Prioritise your goals and tasks – focus on the “vital few”
You can do anything, but you can’t do everything! Prioritising goals and focusing on the “vital few” will enable you to use your time and energy more effectively. Concepts like the Pareto Principle (or the 80/20 rule) and tools such as the well-known Eisenhower Matrix can really help you to prioritise, and de-prioritise your goals, as well as your to-do list.

4. Stop multitasking!
Research has shown that multitasking is less productive than single-tasking. When we think we’re multitasking, we’re really only jumping from one task to another. Every time we move between different tasks, we leave an “attention residue” behind us, which makes it more difficult to focus. Multitasking kills our productivity, and it can also be the cause of constant distraction, procrastination and negative stress.

5. Bring a sense of awareness and curiosity to everything you do
Awareness is the first step in making sustainable positive change. Without a sense of awareness, it’s hard to know what’s wrong and how to fix it. If you find that something isn’t working for you, don’t get frustrated – get curious! “Why isn’t it working?”, “What else can I try?”, “Why do I feel like this?”, “What can I do to feel different?”. Asking these questions with curiosity rather than frustration will help to open doors to solutions.

6. Think of motivation as the reward, not the stimulus
We often think that we need to be motivated in order to start something, but motivation is actually more likely to show up after you’ve started – not before! Think of motivation as being something that needs to be earned, and think of self-discipline as being the way to earn it. Self-discipline is like a muscle – it gets tired when you use it, but it also gets stronger when you exercise it.

7. Manage your energy and your focus – not your time
Knowing how to manage our time effectively is important, but what’s more important is knowing how to manage our energy and our focus. Time is constant, but our energy and focus are not. Having an awareness of what affects our energy and focus allows us to plan and execute our tasks more effectively, and with better results. Remember, there’s a big difference between being efficient, and being effective!

8. Work interdependently with those around you
We can achieve far greater things when we work interdependently, rather than dependently or even independently. When working with others, make sure you are listening with the intention to understand and not just to reply. In dealing with conflict or negotiation, respect other people’s perspectives and be curious about differences in opinion. Once you fully understand, try to figure out a “win/win” solution, or even better – synergise!

9. Don’t kill the goose that lays the golden eggs!
There’s a well-known fable about a farmer and his family who had a goose that laid a golden egg every day. After some time, the farmer and his family thought that instead of waiting for the goose to lay a new egg each day, they could kill the goose and get all the eggs at once. Needless to say, it didn’t work! When we’re working on a project, we sometimes turn into the farmer from this story. Sometimes we’re the goose, and sometimes we’re both. How many of us are guilty of breaking ourselves open to try and get all the golden eggs at once? Are we guilty of doing it to others?

10. Redefine what work/life balance means for you
Work/life balance is a false dichotomy, and trying to achieve any kind of balance based on these two components alone can be very difficult. Think about “life admin” for example, where does that sit on the work/life spectrum? Considering the other factors which play a role on the sliding scale of “work”, “life” and everything in between can help to get a more helpful perspective. Like riding a bicycle, balance sometimes requires momentum, and a lack of momentum in our lives can sometimes cause us to lose our balance. Developing a better awareness of where you spend your energy and how you replenish your energy will help you to rethink this idea, and what it means for you.

Tips to Empower Female Writers in The Business

Jennifer Davidson

 

1. Women don’t have to be exceptional

We’ll have true equality when it’s deemed acceptable for women to be as mediocre as the average man. A lot of men who get their projects commissioned are not exceptional.

It puts extreme pressure on us as women if we feel like every idea that we pitch has to be exceptional. That approach will impact upon the ideas we come up with.

2. You don’t have to be more like a man to succeed

To succeed, lean into your strengths and skillsets. Maybe that includes being particularly sensitive. Embrace that part of yourself rather than trying to fight against it.

3. Feeling vulnerable is an important quality as a writer

We can feel quite isolated dealing with emotional subject matter. You have to go to an emotional place to connect with your characters. Use your own emotional vulnerability as a strength.

4. “Fake it ‘til you make it” is not always a helpful concept

If you’re in the writers’ room or you’re working with a publisher, you’re not faking it. You got there. You’re in that seat because you’ve got a talent. You don’t need to fake anything.

5. Ask for more money

Women always price ourselves lower. Ask for more than you think you deserve, because chances are you’re worth more than you think you deserve. The worst you’ll get is a, “no”. If you do get the amount you’ve asked for, don’t be thinking you need to do extra work. You’ve already proved yourself. There’s a good reason you’re being paid that much.

Your request for more money is not you saying, “Give me more money and I’ll do more work”. Your request is for the task that’s on the table. Anything extra is a different negotiation.

Think about your cash flow. How much money do you want to bring in each month for the next three months. Set yourself a target of how much you want to earn every month and use that to adjust the rates you ask for. That will help you feel much more in control when you’re actively thinking about those numbers.

Act as if you’re negotiating on behalf of someone else. Say your rate and leave a silence. You’re not flexible and you don’t have to explain.

6. Never do a job for free

You’ve put years into your creativity and craft. Don’t underestimate that.

7. Talk numbers, talk money

The more we talk about money among ourselves, the more aware we are of what the standard price is. This gives us power.

8. Have your “assistant” chase payment

Culturally, there can be a shame around money. Make up an accountant or an assistant. Use a dummy email if that helps you have those difficult conversations or say things that you don’t feel comfortable saying.

9. Put yourself forward for more opportunities

Men have a much easier time with this because the system has taught them to ask for what they want, while women have been taught to people-please.

10. Networking is just about connecting with people

You don’t have to be as brash as a lot of men at networking events.
As a writer, you’re a good judge of character. You’ll know who you can trust really quickly. Focus on making connections.

11. We’re not here to teach men about feminism

A lot of men consider themselves to be feminist, however, often they behave in ways that are not feminist and they’re oblivious to it because they’re just being themselves in the room. The patriarchal system has taught them that that’s OK. If you don’t feel comfortable as an individual pointing that out to them, don’t feel under pressure to point it out. It’s not your job.

Networking Tips for Creatives

Eoin Sandford

 

1. Before attending an event, research.
Carry out some research about the people attending. Identify who you wish to speak to and go with a clear goal in mind. Are you looking for a potential new client? Are you looking for specific introductions to other people?

2. Starting a conversation.
Ask the person to elaborate on something you already know about them. Perhaps mention what you know about their last project and ask how it went.

3. Write notes.
Write notes after meaningful conversations if you’ve met someone new. Any little tidbits can always help. The name of the person’s child, the name of their school. Whoever they said they’d be happy to introduce you to.

4. Exit a conversation graciously.
Even if it was not a satisfying encounter always smile and say it was a pleasure to chat and wish the person well on their latest project.

5. Follow up.
Follow up with people you’ve met after every meaningful encounter. Even if you don’t have anything to follow up on, send a message saying, “Really great to meet you. Hopefully we’ll catch up again.”